23 Things I have Learned by 23.

23 Things I have Learned by 23.

So I was just sitting here browsing the web & listening to music like I usually do (even though lately, I’ve been watching SO MUCH GREY’S ANATOMY), & my brain just spun into this crazy place of self-evaluation.  I’m not sure if it’s because we are almost to the New Year or what, but these are some of the things that kept popping back into my thoughts.  Here’s 23 things that I have learned in my 23 years of life…

1. It’s the little things that count.  

Watch the sunset & listen to the waves.  Try new things & see new places.  Remember that a smile goes a long way… I think people often forget that.  Compliment others when you see they need a pick me up.  Send snail mail.  Call people on their birthdays… it’s much better than receiving a text or Wall Post on Facebook.

2. Pretty is as pretty does.  (Something my parents have told me since I was a baby)

One might be on the cover of TIME Magazine for being the most beautiful person the world has ever seen, but if they’re ugly on the inside, their outer beauty becomes irrelevant.  Treat others how you would want to be treated.  Treat others with respect, learn how to agree to disagree & still accept them for who they are.  After all, that is what you will be remembered for.

3. Take time to read.  (This took me a long time to appreciate)

It doesn’t have to be all the time & it doesn’t need to be a ridiculously long novel.  Heck, it could be reading an article about last night’s game instead of watching the replay on ESPN.  Just take time every once in a while to read.  It makes you feel good & let’s you fall into another world for a bit.

4. Never stop learning.

Wether it is advancing in your career, learning a new skill set all together, learning about yourself, or learning about the ones you love.  Keep your brain active & never stop learning. *Sings: The more you know* lol

5. Take risks.

Push your boundaries & make yourself do things that you are TERRIFIED of.  You won’t get anywhere if you never leave your comfort zone so make sure you're not the one holding yourself back.  

6. Cherish others.

No one is guaranteed tomorrow so this one is very simple.  Cherish those around you; family, friend, or stranger.  People are people & every life should be cherished.

7. Stand for something BIGGER than yourself.

Give back.  Big or small, any form of giving back to your community or other organizations is a must!  Not only are you helping others, but it makes you feel good inside.  You’re also creating some good karma for yourself.  What goes around comes back around so always put good out into the world. 

8. Family is family. 

Biological or chosen, family is family.  Keep in touch with those who matter most.  Every family goes through thick & thin but at the end of the day, they’re your people.  Oh, and don’t forget to learn where you come from… ask your grandparents questions & genuinely care about their answers.

9. Have a soft heart.

Over time we may experience hardships.  Please, do not let those hardships take away a soft heart.  Have a kind heart full of compassion & empathy for others.  Try to not build walls & always give people the benefit of the doubt… don’t assume blame on others. 

10. Listen.

To those older than you.  To those younger than you.  To those you disagree with & to those whose side you’re on.  Just listen.

11. Don’t settle.

Set realistic expectations & hold yourself/others to them.  In careers, relationships, & all other aspects of life.  Don’t settle for anything less than you deserve.

12. Believe in Abundance.

Whatever it is…There’s enough to go around for everybody.  Don’t live feeling like you’re being shorted somehow.  Find what you want & make it yours.  

13. Quality over quantity.

Friends.  Shoes.  Leather Jackets.  Cars.  I feel like everyone goes through a faze of just wanting the most of everything.  If you are in that faze you will soon learn to love the nicer, more valuable things in life, instead of the things that will only last you a few weeks.  And when it comes to friends, only surround yourself with people who challenge you, support you & make you a better you.  Don’t waste your time on the rest.

14. Give hugs.

Almost everyone I know loves a good hug!

15. Work hard & support others who are working hard around you. 

Work hard for what you want.  Never expect it to be handed to you.  If you are lucky enough that it is, then be gracious about it.  While working hard & succeeding, it is so, so, so important that you are constantly supporting those around you who are also working towards success.  Bring others up, never tear them down…even if they are the ones reaching success while you’re still striving for it. 

16. Make time for yourself & make time to go on vacations.

This one is pretty simple as well.  If it means you have to wake up an hour earlier to have ‘Me’ time, then do it.  If it means you have to take just one more weekend off of work, then do it. (unless you’re going to lose your job over it….lol be smart now y’all.)

17. There is an incredibly thin line between Confidence and Cockiness.  Try not to cross it… I mean, unless you have to.

Humility is a beautiful trait to have.  Practice it often & make sure you have people in your life who aren’t afraid to keep you grounded.

18. Have regrets & learn from them.

Everyone always talks about never having regrets because there’s nothing you can do about the past.  Even though the whole inability to time travel is true, I say have regrets & learn from your mistakes.  There’s no shame is saying you regret making a certain decision or that you wish you would’ve done something a little differently than you had.

19. Always be a kid at heart. 

Have fun, be unapologetically yourself, get dirty, & never stop using your imagination!

20. Laughter is like medication.

HAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA.  But forreal… it takes fewer muscles to smile than it does to frown AND smiling releases endorphins so you have no choice but to feel at least a little bit better after you have a good laugh.

21. It’s okay to ask for help.

I feel like somewhere along the road of growing up, we begin to feel emotions of shame or embarrassment around needing to ask others for help.  No matter what the help is that you need, know that it is okay to ask for it. 

22. You have to love yourself before you can love anyone else.

WOOOOOOOOAHHHHHHHHHH it just got deep.  Before you can love anyone else, you have to be able to love yourself.  I understand this is a journey (a daily journey I am on myself) & that this might look different for everyone.  But when all is said & done, if you ever only have yourself, I hope that you have learned to love yourself deeply.

23. Never EVER give up on your dreams.

I’m going to just go ahead & say that over the last year, I have almost given up on my dreams twice.  Both times, when I was just about ready to throw in the towel, little pieces of this huge dream I have began to become my reality.  Know that it is okay to doubt yourself.  In fact, I would actually encourage you to acknowledge any feelings of doubt, frustration or confusion that you have towards your dreams & the timing of situations you are in, but please promise me & promise yourself that you will regain your drive/reasoning for chasing them in the first place & NEVER, EVER give up on your dreams.  *Remember if your dreams don’t scare the living SH*T outta you, then they’re not big enough* ;)

I know I am young & that I still have a lot to learn, but I like to think that I am doing pretty well so far.  I wouldn’t be the person I am today without the most amazing family & friends anyone could ever ask for.  If you have been on this journey of life with me at any point in time, thank you.  Thank you for helping me become who I am today.  

What are some of the most important life lessons you have learned so far?  I’d love to hear.

Sooo Much love,

Tay XXO

P.S. Just a bonus I thought I’d throw in there.  IT IS OKAY TO NOT HAVE IT ALL FIGURED OUT, BUT IT’S NOT OKAY TO NOT HAVE A SAVINGS ACCOUNT!